Disability Language: A Guide to Respectful Words and Inclusion

Disability Language Matters: How Words Shape Inclusion and Belonging

Disability language can feel intimidating for many people. You may want to be respectful but worry about saying the wrong thing — or you may not know what words are best to use. I’m passionate about helping individuals and communities understand disability language in a compassionate, practical way. This guide offers simple tips and tools to help you interact with people with disabilities with more confidence, respect, and ease

Disability is not a rare experience, and it is not something we should have to whisper about or work around. People with disabilities are part of every community, workplace, school, and family. The good news is that respectful language doesn’t have to be complicated. Small changes — like using clear words, avoiding outdated phrases, and listening to how people describe themselves — can make a meaningful difference in how welcome and valued people feel.

Disability is not a bad word.

Using clear, honest language matters. Disability is a fact of life and part of the human experience. Avoiding the word doesn’t protect people, it often creates barriers instead.

Listening matters more than getting it “right.”

There isn’t one perfect way to talk about disability. Some people prefer person-first language. Others prefer identity-first language. What matters most is listening to how people describe themselves and respecting those choices.

Some words do harm even when it was unintended.

Outdated terms, casual phrases, and disability used as a metaphor or insult quietly reinforce negative ideas. Retiring those words isn’t about being overly careful it’s about choosing language that respects the dignity and humanity of everyone.

Assistive devices are not tragedies.

Wheelchairs, communication devices, and service animals are tools for access and independence. How we talk about them reflects whether we see disability as a problem or access as a right.

People with disabilities are not here to inspire us.

Calling someone “inspirational” just for navigating an inaccessible world shifts attention away from broken systems and onto individuals. That’s a subtle form of ableism, even when intentions are good. People with disabilities deserve dignity, not pity wrapped in praise.

Accessibility is not a favor.

Access shouldn’t depend on someone asking, explaining, or waiting. When accessibility is treated as a right, belonging becomes possible.

Disability is also community.

For many people, disability is a source of connection, culture, shared experience, and pride. Recognizing this helps us move beyond seeing disability only as an individual experience.

Language should assume competence.

When we speak with respect, avoid baby talk, and move away from limiting labels, we create space for growth, agency, and opportunity.

At the heart of all these wishes is one simple idea:
Language shapes belonging.

You don’t have to be perfect.
You don’t have to know everything.
You just have to be willing to learn, listen, and grow.

My hope is that this blog made you pause, reflect, or feel more confident using the word disability.

Please follow me on LinkedIn for more on disability language, inclusion and advocacy.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/linda-bonner-4953211a7/

And if you’re looking for tools, resources, and guidance on disability advocacy, including ways to promote inclusion, accessibility, and equity, you can learn more at www.blessedwithextraordinary.com.

Thank you for being part of this conversation.